9 Must-Try Tips for Using a Vibrator with Your Partner

You already know that your favorite vibrator is a game changer when it comes to self-love sessions. You may also know that there are lots of ways bringing your vibrator into the bedroom with your partner can take your sex life to the next level. Not only does adding a vibrator to the mix enhance the sexual experience for both of you, but it can also help make short work of performance anxiety.

However, knowing you’re both officially ready to give using a vibrator together a try is one thing. Feeling confident that you actually know where to start is another. Here we’ll go over a few tips for successfully integrating a vibrator into your sex life with your partner. We’ll let you in on a few scintillating moves that you’ll both love.

1. Be sure to stay engaged with your partner.

We all love the way vibrators can make the act of taking care of your own pleasure nearly effortless. You get to just lie back, relax, and let your buzzworthy little friend do most of the work, right? While there’s definitely nothing wrong with that, you’ll want to avoid zoning out too much when you play with your partner.

Successful shared experiences let the vibrator simply enhance what’s already going on between the two of you. Look longingly into your partner’s eyes. Touch them, talk to them, and provide plenty of auditory feedback. Put the vibrator completely aside from time to time as well, the better to simply focus on enjoying one another’s bodies.

2. Take a moment to show your partner the ropes.

Let’s just say it’s your very first time using a toy together. You’ve got to start somewhere and a short, sexy lesson on how you like to use your vibrator when you’re all by yourself is as good a place as any. If you like, you can keep things strictly informative by showing them how to operate the toy and letting them know which settings really curl your toes before you get started.

You can also turn up the dial on the “hot” factor by showing instead of telling. Treat your partner to a scintillating show by masturbating for them and showing them just how much you enjoy your toy. Describe what you’re doing as you’re doing it and explain why what you’re doing feels so good. When you’re both ready, invite your partner to take the reigns and finish you off.

3. Show your partner how things can be all about them as well.

Vibrations don’t just feel fantastic on clits, vaginas, and other sensitive parts of the female anatomy. Your guy has plenty of sweet spots of his own that will positively come alive when you introduce them to your trusty vibrator. Showing him is a great way to help him fully grasp what a vibrator brings to the table, not only for you but for him as well.

Put your vibrator on a low, gentle setting and use it to caress his shaft, balls, taint, or all of the above. You can also do this while you provide additional, more familiar stimulation with your mouth or your free hand. (It’s also worth noting that if you and your partner are not fluid bonded, a condom fits just as comfortably over a classic style vibrator as it does a flesh and blood penis.)

4. Consider taking a couple’s toy for a spin.

Bringing a personal vibrator you already own into the bedroom is a great way to introduce toys into your shared sex life with your partner. If both of you like what a vibrator brings to the table, consider shopping for a vibrating couple’s toy that’s specially designed to be used together.

A vibrating cock ring is perhaps the simplest option to integrate into your sex life. Not only does it deliver the same good vibrations you’ve both fallen in love with, but cock rings have the added advantage of helping your partner stay harder and last longer. There are also amazing couple’s vibes like the options in the popular We-Vibe line to try.

5. Think outside the box when it comes to sweet spots.

Your genitals aren’t the only areas on your bodies that benefit from a little extra stimulation. The same vibrations that can so easily deliver intense, satisfying orgasms feel fantastic on other parts as well. Consider treating yourself and your partner to a session that’s about identifying them all.

For instance, you could try using a bullet vibe or the tip of a classic vibrator set to a low setting to stimulate your nipples. Start by circling your own and then do the same with your partner’s. Then slowly increase the speed and intensity of the vibrations. Go back and forth between sucking or licking each other’s nipples and stimulating them with the vibrator.

6. Use your vibrator to enhance a blow job.

If your male partner is like most men, a really great blow job is probably among his favorite things in life. Try making the next one extra special by integrating your vibrator into the mix. A warm, wet mouth and a few well-targeted vibrations can really make beautiful music together if you approach things from the right direction.

Hold your vibrator against your cheek as you work your usual magic on his head and shaft. He’ll love the way the deep rumbling vibrations make your mouth feel even more inviting than usual. If you’d really like to pull out all the stops, you can try enhancing the experience even further with some flavored sensation-enhancing lube made specifically for oral sex.

7. Try experimenting with your vibe before your clothes even come off.

Foreplay can make all the difference when it comes to how much you’ll both enjoy the main event. That said, your vibrator is more than just a great way to help things along once the clothes are off and it’s truly go time. It can be a great way to add spice and nuance to foreplay as well.

Try taking turns using your vibe on one another while you’re still partially clothed. Run it over your partner’s crotch while they’re still wearing their underthings and invite them to do the same to you. Make out as you trace each other’s outlines in a teasing, tantalizing way until neither of you can stand it anymore. This can be a great non-intimidating experiment to try if your partner is 100% new to sex toys as well.

8. Treat each other to some no-holds-barred massage.

If you have a wand-style vibrator, massage is another great option to consider if your partner is new to vibrators in general or if either of you is feeling shy about using one together for the first time. Wand vibrators are just as ideally designed for working the kinks out of sore, tired muscles as they are anything more intimate. Plus, a simple massage is an enjoyable, no-pressure way to connect with your partner anytime.

The next time they could use a little TLC, invite your partner to lie back, relax, and trust their body to your very capable hands. Use the vibe to work the kinks out of their neck, their back, or any other trouble spot they specify. Then slowly make your way toward a sexier spot while watching your partner for signs that they’re into it. If both of you decide you’d like to take things to the next level, go for it!

9. Try a little remote action on for size.

Vibrators that are made with couples in mind go well beyond wearable options and strategically shaped bullets that fit easily into any type of play. Thanks to the wonders of modern technology, there are many vibrators out there on the market that can be controlled remotely, either by you or by a partner. Some utilize an actual remote while others are Bluetooth or wi-fi enabled, letting you use your smartphone instead.

As you can imagine, remote controlled toys open the door to a whole new wealth of possibilities. Insert the vibrating component and hand the controls over to your partner to take advantage of from across the room (or across town, if you prefer). Take advantage of remote-controlled toys as ways to enjoy a little X-rated fun while one of you is away for the day or to help keep things hot if you’re in a long-distance relationship. There are even synched toy pairs available that allow each of you to “feel” what the other is doing in real time.

As you can see, adding a vibrator to the mix is a wonderful way to spice things up or make sure things stay sizzling hot between you and your partner. Definitely take the above suggestions for a spin, but don’t be afraid to come up with new ideas of your own. With today’s vibrators in your corner, the only limits on your play are those set by your imagination!